Thursday, December 31, 2009

Snowpocalypse 2009

It snowed. More than anyone was expecting. Now, on the verge of 2010, snow still lies on the ground. i'm thinking it'll stick around for the beginning of the year.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Merry Christmas

Thanks to our Oregonian neighbors and friends who have "Hanai-ed" those of us from FOB:YF. Even with no gift exchange this year, Christmas was still Christmas. No snow though, i'm waiting...

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Snow, and the Lack Thereof...

As you can tell by the title of this post, i am perplexed by the lack of icy cold goodness falling out of the sky. While we have seen our few days of single digit temperatures, snow is ever elusive.
The forecast for the Christmas weekend is partly sunny. Partly sunny. Did i mention partly sunny?

It is now time for all of us on the Internet to collectively channel Bing Crosby and the Irving Berlin song.

i'll wait...

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The Deluge

i was about to write about the single digit temperatures here at FOB:YF, but it was just too cold. Imagine, if you will, constantly thinking about keeping warm or maintaining warmth, or something do with warm, warmth, heat and/or hot. Sort of like that. Oddly enough, no snow. Color me surprised. Cheated perhaps?

Winter is just getting started, let's see.

Surprise! Now it's raining. Where is the leak in the barn? Why are the impact resistant insulators suddenly not impact resistant any longer? Why ? Why Why?

Suddenly, the venting stopped... and the blog post was concluded.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Not Warm...

The exterior thermometer read 24 Degrees F as i headed out for chores phase 1.
It's very dark at 6 am. The flashlight beam lights up the ice crystals that cover the grass, dog feet crunching on top of them. The scene, with clouds of exhaled C02 in the air, strikes me a something out of the "X Files"- only we're on a farm, there are no UFOs and no FBI agents. Otherwise, it is exactly the same.

Funny how quickly one loses feeling in their hands at that temperature.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

In Memory of

Usually, the blog posts are light fare. Snarky or sarcastic- thin attempts at humor or maybe brief foray into the philosophical. i won't be doing any of that today.

The BKODs had for a month or so, allowed another feral cat into their domain. He enjoyed his time so much here he was given a name, Ainmire. It is Gaelic for "Great Lord"
Thus Ainmire was welcomed into the FOB:YF family, he would gleefully charge after the dogs at full speed, attempting to leap onto the dogs backs, or perhaps hang from their necks. Ainmire earned his keep as well; hunting to protect the barn from rodents.

Feeding time is always at the same time twice a day. One saturday, last saturday, he failed to come to feeding. On sunday, our worse fears were confirmed by a neighbor down the road.

He had died.

How ? i don't know. Some things, i think, we just aren't allowed to know the why or how.

It just is.

It saddens me that we lost him. The dogs know, the BKODs seem to know as well. Our little family is diminished.

Goodbye Ainmire, you came home after all.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

In Flanders Field

In Flanders Fields

Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918)
Canadian Army

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Happy Halloween!

Wait. Yes, i noticed the date is wrong as well. Here at F.O.B:Y.F, things have been slightly askew, hence the posting schedule. Treading water is a good thing, as this is an indication you are not drowning. Barely.

Chew on that, dear readers.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009


The ground clouds have made their appearance again at F.O.B:Y.F. With them comes tidings of much toiling; the fallen leaves, the many branches. Vexed are we at lack of the machinery, the workings of which were unknown to the peoples of the islands.

Yeah. i mean a leaf blower.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Rock Yeah.

There is about 13 tons of gravel and perhaps 10+/- or more tons of river sand currently visiting us here at F.O.B:Y.F. The great winterizing project of 09 has finally begun, so these are not uninvited guests.

To help you keep your mind off the scale of the project, i present "The Real JDM"

Sunday, October 4, 2009

To Les...

Rest In Peace.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Saturday, September 26, 2009

808 Pastry

i'm sure i've mentioned these before, but here they are again- as i have a craving for them. Behold, the Starbucks Oatcake!

Thanks to A Passion For Food for the reminder of home.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

A Car Commercial

Feeling the Cash for Clunkers Blues? Your old car letting you down? We here at F.O.B:Y.F would like to offer these as practical metallic pick me ups for your automobile "blahs" Forza!

Monday, September 14, 2009

14 September 2009

When I was younger, so much younger than today,
I never needed anybody's help in any way.
But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured,
Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors.

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down
And I do appreciate you being round.
Help me, get my feet back on the ground,
Won't you please, please help me?

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways,
My independence seems to vanish in the haze.
But every now and then I feel so insecure,
I know that I just need you like I've never done before.

-John Lennon Paul McCartney

Changes, for better or worse, continue to land like unexpected fruit pies falling out of the sky at F.O.B: Y.F.

Did you know that you can only get Starbucks Oatcakes in the state of Hawaii?
Did you know that saimin costs money ? ( along with everything else)
Did you know that Ketchup is Catsup ?
Did you know that some people insist on no anchovies? Shame on you, heathen bastards.

With everything that is coming (and even the things that aren't), i will continue to write objective, un-biased, and scintillating tripe that some call "writing", and others call "swill".
This is for the sole benefits of the residents of F.O.B: Y.F and those amongst you on the internet willing to stomach the journey, stream of Consciousness writing... or what i like to call the venomous blathering that spews from my fingers and toes-Ready at once to peel the facade of mother Internet! Willing to brave danger at every corner of the WWW...

oh wait.

The captain has turned off the fasten seatbelts sign, you may roam about the internet at will.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Sunday, September 6, 2009

No Surprises

A heart that's full up like a landfill, a job that slowly kills you, bruises that won't heal...
-"No Surprises"

i'd figure that a quote from a goth-y, angst ridden lyric might be a welcome break from the normal torrent of butterknife sharp wit around here. Today is one of the yearly markers here at Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom. What is it? Why it's national tune your guitar to low B day, Johnny!

i kid, i kid. i kid because i love. -
Herschel Shmoikel Pinchas Yerucham Krustofski, a.k.a "Krusty The Clown"

Things have been a little slow at FOB:YF, the charges have been sent to other ranches for training, leasing or general boarding. That all changes as of Today. i will be the first to admit that the winter prep tasks before us seem a bit daunting, but it has to get done. While it was a nice break in routine, FOB:YF is missing something without our one horsepower friends.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Paradise Lost?

An article regarding racism in Hawaii, from the Southern Poverty Law Center:

Prejudice In Paradise

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Hey Joe

Acoustic Shred

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Mini Heat Wave

A "mini" heatwave has descended upon the Pacific-Northwest. Thankfully, the residents of Yamhill will be spared from the blistering, brutal onslaught from the previous month. Various weather services have made forecasts of 96-100F today. i am hoping for lower rather than higher.

My charges have been off site for awhile now. Getting used to the change in tempo and scheduling of FOBYF will take awhile. As long as the horses are happy...

Friday, August 7, 2009

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Shade Us Now (Or How I Learned To Not Enjoy Summer)

As an exercise in writing, i try not to let my little corner of the internets turn into a giant bitch fest.
Here is a small bit of good news.

The current brutal heatwave that is suffocating the Willamette Valley in particular, and most of the Pacific Northwest in general ,is starting to break. Relief continues to come with each new sunrise, and the weather is expected to get back to normal (80s' -ish) by Tuesday of next week.


*did that paragraph make any sense at all? i should just write in little notebooks and scan the entries. At least my handwriting would get better..*

-end break

We continue to research our options regarding re-conditioning of the paddock/barn areas. With the amount of *distractions* and *setbacks* happening here at F.O.B.Y.F , channeling energies into something that has tangible, positive results...would be nice. To say the least.

Vague? Fuzzy ? Yes, i do that on purpose.

To the cheese cave , nocturnal flying creature male! It's certainly much cooler there.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009


That's right, the mercury hit a mind melting 106 degrees F today. Where did i leave my fruit punch?

The weather services are reporting one more day of scorchingly inferno like temperatures (say it with a smile) with some relief coming as early as Wednesday night. For a person born and raised in Hawaii like myself, i would consider a snowfall of at least 1 foot on Wednesday "relief".

Thank you for your time.

Monday, July 27, 2009


The Nation Weather Service has posted a big red warning regarding the Oregon weather: "Oppressive Heat Developing Inland Through Midweek". First rule of writing? Keep it simple. So I present my warning: "Summer. It gets Hot"

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Hot Heat

This week brings us the promise of 100 degree + weather for several days at a time. If i had a wall that was mine, would i put some handwriting on it?

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Guitar News

In other news, is Ozzy considering replacing Zakk?

via Classic Rock Magazine

Hmm. i dunno if i would buy that new Ozzy album.

Monday, July 20, 2009


Houston, Tranquilty Base here. The Eagle has landed.

Saturday, July 18, 2009


The horses have been relocated to a secret location somewhere in Oregon. We have decided to till the entire field/yard/paddock under so that we can plant a suitable grazing mix. This can only be done if my charges are off property.

How odd it is to look out not see the horses. Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom seems very empty.

Many changes in the works. Am i happy with them? Fuck no.



Sunday, July 5, 2009



Lately, fear of the giant hydrogen ball has kept me from my regular posting duties. That and the little distraction known as real life... you know like wondering if the great leader wants to send a nuke to a remote island in the pacific, providing for the farm, that sort of stuff. So in the interest of keeping this post remotely entertaining (if only to me) Here are some things that have or have not happened in Yamhill, Oregon:

Nope. No Stoplight yet. I like it just the way it is.

If you go to the TMO, you might see overalls, cowboy hats & spurs, Cammo and John Deere caps all on the same day, on one person! Or not...

It's getting to be quite hot. Did i mention summers get hot?

The Loncheria/Taco Wagon in McMinville, Oregon is a thing of epicurial wonder and delight. GO. NOW.

They may call it "Sushi" but it's not. Thats right, Safeway McMinville, i'm looking at you.

i love the signs that say: Right Turn Permitted Without Stopping. Posted at stopsigns. Awesome.

Bob the Llama is now shorn. You must avert your gaze when looking upon the countenance of Bob the Llama.

i need to help the BKODs win the war againt the mole army. Yet, we cannot poison the soil. Would you believe some persons would suggest using ultrasonic mole chaser stakes and Juicy Fruit chewing gum? ( as opposed to swallowing gum, but i digress...)

Willsonville road. i *heart* thee..

Tailgating, its the Oregon pastime. And i don't mean hagning out at a sports event grilling and hanging with your buds.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

July 4, 2009

The Declaration of Independence of The United States of America

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for
one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected
them with another, and to assume, among the Powers of the earth,
the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and
of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions
of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which
impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal,
that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights,
that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.
That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men,
deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,
That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends,
it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute
new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing
its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect
their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments
long established should not be changed for light and transient causes;
and accordingly all experience hath shown, that mankind are more disposed
to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing
the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and
usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce
them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw
off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.
--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now
the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government.
The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated
injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment
of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts
be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary
for the public good.

He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate
and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation
till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended,
he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of
large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish
the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right
inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual,
uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their
Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them
into compliance with his measures.

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing
with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions,
to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative Powers,
incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large
for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed
to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States;
for that purpose obstructing the Laws of Naturalization of Foreigners;
refusing to pass others to encourage their migration hither,
and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent
to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.

He has made judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure
of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of
Officers to harass our People, and eat out their substance.

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies
without the Consent of our legislatures.

He has affected to render the Military independent of
and superior to the Civil Power.

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction
foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws;
giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended legislation:

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from Punishment for any Murders
which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

For imposing taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us, in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring
Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government,
and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once
an example and fit instrument for introducing the same
absolute rule into these Colonies:

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws,
and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves
invested with Power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection
and waging War against us.

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns,
and destroyed the lives of our people.

He is at this time transporting large armies of foreign mercenaries
to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun
with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the
most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy of the Head of a civilized nation.

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas
to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of
their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has
endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers,
the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare,
is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress
in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered
only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked
by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler
of a free People.

Nor have We been wanting in attention to our Brittish brethren.
We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their
legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us.
We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and
settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice
and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our
common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably
interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been
deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore,
acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them,
as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of America,
in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of
the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name,
and by the Authority of the good People of these Colonies,
solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are,
and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States;
that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown,
and that all political connection between them and the State
of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved;
and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to
levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce,
and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may
of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm
reliance on the Protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge
to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Season The Second

Summer will soon be upon us in full effect. Meanwhile at Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom, the staff and i have been in full situational awareness mode. We have implemented electronic and physical countermeasures in respsone to the sunny onslaught of Summer. Some of the unclassifed measures include the playing of "Winter" from Vivaldi's "The Four Seasons".

While the days have not been over 80Degrees F, it is warm enough to warrant a change from the standard uniform. Change, it would appear, comes with varying amounts of fleece.

In other news: the BKODs have been waging covert war against the vast underground mole army. We are hoping for BKOD superiority over the disputed areas in the coming weeks if not days.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


An actual perfect day in Yamhill...

Thursday, June 18, 2009


i've been busy, and so it goes...

Friday, June 5, 2009

The Storm

There were thunderstorms predicted for yesterday. They showed up.... and brought something else.


The day began like any other. Lately, its been getting warmer(and i mean anything above 72 Degrees F), so i expected to finish the farm chores earlier to beat the heat and the approaching storm.

i sat with my laptop, finishing my electronic work, when i heard a banging noise on the window. When i looked out, i noticed an interesting reddish cloud coming over the hay field. *


The wind started to howl, the horses began to spook, and the rain of debris began. It was trash day today; the giant sippy cup trash bins were lined up like little soldiers at the beginning of the driveway. Each container can hold up to 200lbs- they are quite heavy. Consider me surprised when i saw them tumbling like wadded up pieces of paper down the driveway.

i had to go outside.

It was sort of what you'd think being in a tornado is like, but in this case, all the wind came from the south, and less "tornado-ey". The horses seemed to take it in stride after a little while, only spooking when the big sustained gusts came in. As i made my way to barn to shut the front door ( trying to keep oak branches out of my retinas ) i noticed large fallen boughs at the front of the drive. Gardening for the next few days will totally suck, i think.

The power took at hit twice, but came back online.

Twenty minutes later, it was all over. Anybody game for helping me clean up?

*duh, thats the monster winds picking up all the soil from the aforementioned field of hay.

Thursday, June 4, 2009


With some of the more somber posts recently, i've decided to take a break.

Here is Camp:

Monday, June 1, 2009

General Motors

I never thought it would happen in my lifetime, if ever. General Motors has declared bankruptcy.

They've made a commercial, via Jalopnik.

Sunday, May 31, 2009


June will be upon us shortly. With the rise in temperature comes the packing- that's right, the standard issue Oregonian uniform actually gets put away for two weeks, or was it two months? Regardless of that little detail, i'm looking forward to some aspects of CONUS summer weather. Not the heat though. Is there a way to separate the heat for the season of summer? Is it possible to request all the hot days in one day?

Friday, May 29, 2009

A single layer

A single layer of clothing. External temperatures have reached a high of 85 Degrees F.
Lots of water. Lots of other things or something.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Black Adder Goes Forth: Memorial Day 2009

Memorial Day 2009

It's not about beer and BBQ:

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

-John McCrae

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Creative escapes.

i have been sitting here, laptop in lap, attempting to write something. Anything. Ok. So nothing yet,
So it goes.

i hear the tv in the living room. The scientist/police officer with Fonz like powers is on the tube right now. i can hear Daltry screaming now.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Problem Solving

i've come to grips with the fact that there are many ways to solve problems. This is a very common paradigm in the coding community. Having said that, some solutions are more right than others. When drowning, try not to drown more. When alive, enjoy life as it is, in the now.

Philosophy aside, here is a 1970's Ford Mustang with a Tank Engine swap:

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Politics And Cars.

Normally i don't do politics here:

My thoughts.Everyone go out there and buy a Ferrari. There are affordable ones. Got the money? Buy Two Veyrons and put Apple stickers right on the paint. Got even more money? Buy a squadron of operational WWII era American Bombers. Don't forget the apple sticker nose art.

Then drive or fly the PISS out of them. Make sure you have a bag of quarter pounders in the cabin ( in the old styrofoam boxes- of course) .That  coffee in your cup holder? It  must have processed white sugar, or splenda.

Pick out your exotic,muscle car, bomber, lear jet, lawn tractor, and pick freedom of choice.

Saturday, May 9, 2009


Without and shadow of  a doubt, pure genius....

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Oregon Roads

Besides the preponderance of excellent tailgataters on Oregon roads, there is an obvious lack of reflective signage such as :



say.. when making a gnarly hairpin or sweeper on a mountain road- in the dark- very very high up.
Such is the charm of rural mountain roads i suppose.. just dangerous enough to keep you involved.

Ground Clouds Return To Yamhill

Hello Fogness my old friend
It's so nice to see you again...

Something i've not seen in a while, the foggy misty and watery ground cloud phenomenon has returned to Yamhill. While no cause for alarm, it does provide a nice movie shot in the morning.

Provided that you were  filming a movie that required Yamhill and Fog.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Derby Day

Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom and our ranch alter-egos would like to extend our congratulations to Mine That Bird and jockey Calvin Borel.

To trainer Benny Woolley Jr. and the rest of the Mine That Bird crew, GO BABY GO!

Friday, May 1, 2009

Yamhill County Facts

Here are some interesting facts about the towns and cities in Yamhill County:

Thursday, April 30, 2009


To take my mind off my mind, we will be discussing computers today.
i'm sure that somewhere, out in the dark world of the Internet, there is a lone Commodore 64 dilligently slinging packets for its' owner. Or not.

This link will provide you with a TCP/IP stack for your IBM PC Jr.

Here is a list of 808 BBSs':

Go forth and enjoy ASCII

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Mysterious Light Fills Yamhill Sky!

Maybe not so mysterious. 2130 HRS PST and it's still light out. Ahhh, the mainland.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Continuing Saga

i don't mean the progressive rock band from the 80's- Our continuing saga continues. There seems to be a lot of rain coming down on this particular parade. Perhaps it is my geographical location? Perhaps it is test of faith from a supernatural being, or beings? Perhaps those were really flying monkeys over the skies of Yamhill after all?

As we at Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom soldier on through the obstacles presented to us, consider this:

And there it is... you are now free to roam about the Internet at will.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Spring: The executive summary.

i have a feeling that the weather changes here quite frequently. Just to keep you on your toes.

One day late, and missing the element of snow, Easter sunday 2008 had a repeat. A quick reminder: Easter Sunday 2008 Rained, Hailed and Snowed.

The Monday following Easter sunday 2009: Sunny. Quite sunny. Followed by suddenly dark, then Biblical quality downpour and for dessert- Hail. Raingear ? No. Cold weather attire? No. Soaking wet and covered with ice pellets? Why yes.

Of course, the horses were smart enought to seek shelter. Go figure.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Car Club. Newberg, Oregon

i lied, this post has nothing to do with car clubs. This has everything to do with the John Deere Club having a meeting at the local Wilco Farm Store- in Newberg Oregon.

Jackets! T-Shirts! Museum Pieces! Newberg! Exclamation Points! Lots of JD Green.....

Monday, April 6, 2009

Sproingy Sound

With Spring comes the giant yellow ball of light and heat, gnats, and taxes. i don't use this to discuss politics or current events, but i will mention that the BKODs appear to be hoarding money. Such is the economy at this point. With various fiscal concerns hanging above the skies of Yamhill it should be no surprise to see farm animals with their rolls of nickels, dimes and quarters, thumbs be damned.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Good Eats: with all due respect to Alton Brown

This link:

in honor this link, i present this recipe:

1 tomato, chopped
1 onion, chopped
Shoyu (soy sauce, for the rest of you) to taste
Sambal ( a lot) to taste
1 Lowly Tin of Sardines, or your favorite canned fish. Not Tuna! Are you some sort of fucking luantic?*

Combine tomato onion and sardines in a bowl, add sambal and shoyu to desired heat /salt combination. Stir. Consume. Ponder the deeper questions of life as you sink deeper into sardinification. Something fishy? i should hope so.

Enjoy- or not- with a refreshing beverage.

*watercresss can be added for the super ultra hardcore amongst you.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Balance, Restored.

Upon my return, i noticed that one of the neighbors' genus Capra was not taking it's usual grazing position. This continued, all the while i was thinking , perhaps it has taken up residence in the shed because of the winter? Sadly, it has died, leaving its sister behind.  A chance meeting with the neighbor at a TMO gave us the story. 

You know what? We know people with goats! 

With much bleating, balance and order has been restored to the Force. 

Even with taxes, creditors ,lawyers and other things.. Spring is still coming, and the goats will graze as they always do.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Spring. The Revenge.

The Daffodils are starting to bloom as well as the Crocus (Krokus? "Long Stick Goes Boom" is an excellent song!) The roses and trees are budding as well. This appears to be the point in the year where we transition from Dark and Cold to Dark Cold AND Wet. To be fair, the giant gas ball of light and heat has made itself known in the airspace above Yamhill. All to brief, i have to admit.

You can still find many opportunities to lose your boots in 3" to 5" of Yamhill mud if you hurry and act now. This is a one time offer.

If you like cars, look here.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Wither Thou, Spring?

Spring has Sprung upon us in deepest Yamhill, unleashing its' fierce and benevolent springy powers upon the unsuspecting Yamhillites. I await the grass.

Monday, March 9, 2009

DST and you.

DST has stolen sleep from us. No matter, with the push ahead in time for Spring, we "gain" more daylight for ranch/farm chores and, as an  added spring bonus, we get some snow. Spring huh? 

Snow is always good. 'Nuff said.

Thursday, March 5, 2009


We're still here. The snow has been replaced with liquid warm snow, a.k.a, "rain" or "sky water", and a healthy dollop of mud. Please make sure you don't lose your boots when you visit. 

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Debriefing: Part Deux of a Nine Part Trilogy IIa.29va

Now that i've spent some time acclimating to the 30+ degree difference in temperature, never mind the humidity, there are some neat things about that remote island in the pacific:

  • No freezing once leaving the shower.
  • An abundance of Mac Salad.
  • Ocean? They got plenty.
  • Shorts? All the time.
  • One Blanket. If that.
  • Tradewinds. Warm winds of Trade.
  • Fruit Punch. Yes they have it elsewhere, but Hawaii seems to have a very specific ratio of syrup to water.

What was alarming:

  • Boy its hot and humid!
  • Did i mention hot and the humidity?
  • Traffic!
  • Houses so close...
  • Traffic!

surprisingly, i was very happy to step off HA flight 26 to cold, wet and rainy Oregon. We stopped at Shari's* and called it a night.

*TMO was closed.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009


On my mission away from Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom, i have encountered:

KimChee III
The Big Yellow Ball of Heat and Light

Mission notes will be distributed on a need to know basis.

Sunday, February 22, 2009


Hello Internet peoples...

i am here:

21°18′32″N 157°49′34″W


Tuesday, February 17, 2009


The timing of this borders on:

  • Irony
  • Prophetic
  • Silly
  • Very Silly
  • Mega Huge, Brutally Brutal Silly

and i am writing of, you wonder? Details soon. Please join me in looking at the snow on the mountains.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

The 14th.

i cooked.

Happy Valentines day, Aloha!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

hoo da hot

Did i say it was pushing 60°F a few days ago? It's snowing. Now.


Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Scale.

The word "Scale", when used in music terminology, is from the Italian Scala or ladder. Sometimes i think of the device used for weighing things or people..

Here in Forward Operational Base Yamhill Freedom, i am the primary mess officer. i am by no means a "foodie", "chef", "gourmand", or "gourmet"... however i do enjoy cooking, and the missives of Chairman Kaga. Why am i mentioning this? When i arrived here, i weighed 135-138lbs, clothed. Now dear internet person, i have experienced the full wrath of Winter; the need to constantly stuff your face.

Can you hold that mental picture in your head? Please stop thinking about the beach and that blue drink for one second. It's so cold that people head out to restaurants /bars /inns etc. in droves so that they can:

  1. Get warm on someone elses' dime (you have to pay for heat? what a country -ed)
  2. Drink
  3. Eat
  4. Drink
  5. Eat
  6. GOTO 1

What do i weigh now? We don't have a scale.


So folks, when you decide to join us here on your own adventures, please make note of your weight- pre Oregon status. We will be collecting data for statistical analysis and will be sending this data to our insect overlords stationed in Zeta1 Reticuli.

Bon appetit, and Aloha!

*here is a scale for you:


Saturday, February 7, 2009

Sunny at 57F

i was persuaded to take a trip into Beaverton, as there are no Borders Books or Barnes & Nobles nearby. No books called out to me today- though i did get a little music manuscript notebook.
Will i finally write my symphonic trilogy in six parts? My ode to Mozart and Bach...a Mach piece?
A hauntingly familiar music done in tone rows? "Mustang Sally" reworked in a slack key style Open "G" tuning ?

Look at the date. Please note i have yet to go to Powells Books! Also note, dear readers, the 12th is almost upon us.

Remember, there are two words that make any sign instantly more fun and emotionally charged!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Nicks'...Brew Moon...

Nicks Fish Market and Brew Moon have closed on the island of Oahu.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Damn Right, I gots the Blues..

Even if your day totally sucks... this will fix it ( for six+ minutes anyway...)

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Snark, it's for Breakfast...

In all fairness, here are some cars worth considering if you are member of the celeb set:

BMW 7 Hydrogen fuel cell car.
Honda FCX Clarity Hydrogen fuel cell car.

No emissions, ZERO. *THAT* is good for the environment.

Monday, February 2, 2009

The Cult of Personality

I saw this on some online news website:

Miley Cyrus says her mom's black Porsche -- which she inherited around her 16th birthday -- was driving her crazy.
So she ditched it for a new set of wheels.
"I didn't like it 'cause it was bad for the environment, and it was too big," she says in a new video on her Web site. "My dad surprised me last night with a black Prius."
She likes it better because it's "good for the environment, and it's adorable!"

Ok this is easy:

1: When you go on tour, do you have:
  • a private jet or plane
  • a tour bus or buses
  • limo or multiple vehicles for press or publicity
  • limo for the entourage
* if the answer is yes to any of the above, please tell he people that write your press releases to shut your fucking holes about the environment. Hear that ? Mother Earth is calling, and she wants to kick your ass (and we are speaking of the collective ,"celebrity" ass but what do i know..)

2) Those environmentally "friendly" Prius' still burn gas when at speed...and what i find incredibly amusing, is that they carry an ARRAY (that means more than one..) of mother earth hating lead acid batteries. Lead? Acid? Sounds green to me. Lets see:

plastic for the battery housing "from the rain forest!"

lead, nickel , copper and other heavy metals "from the rain forest, and it makes me feel good about being better than non celebrities!"

sulphuric or muratic acid "hand made by indigenous tribes in the rain forest, with unicorns running the co-op in an almost ashram-kibbutz fashion." oh yeah... i went there..

So i'm glad that one person, it would seem the only person who cares, has actually thought of their environmental impact and "carbon footprint" and is truly active in being a caretaker of Gaia and not some vapid, shallow publicity excursion. Perish the thought..

*please note the use of satire, thank you. It's the U.S.A, freedom of speech and all that..

Disclosure: My current vehicle currently burns coal, gold and depleted Uranium and Cobalt isotopes as fuel. The current mileage is 5 feet per gallon (in volume ) of fuel. Giant flames shoot out the exhaust an the vehicle is currently street legal on the planet Mars and in certain areas of Easter Island.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

More Sunday Guitar

This guy! Obey...


i like Music, don't you? i like guitars too..

Here is Shane Gibson playing "Dooosh" and "Ducksinapond"

Superbowl Sunday

From Trask Mountain Outpost: Yamhill, Oregon:

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Saturday In Portland, Proper...

Hey its out of order, but so am i...

On Saturday we went to Typhoon to celebrate the 1 year anniversary of M's arrival in Oregon. We were invited by secret persons A & D.
After the spicy Thai feast, we went across the street to:

Live jazz quartet, drinks with friends, Thai feast. Pretty awesome i must say...

Sardines, the Internet and You....

Go here:

Passion? Obsession? Canned Fish? All i want to know is how do i get a bottle of
Secret Aardvark Hot Sauce???

Friday, January 23, 2009

Asian Bistro. Newberg Oregon.

i was treated to dinner tonight, possibly as payment for elevating my blood pressure whilst dealing with TELCOs. or something. The Asian Bistro is located deep in Newberg next to AutoZone. A few things i'm used to in Chinese restaurants; a bottle of shoyu, a little pot of chinese mustard, perhaps a jar of of chili oil or sambal, and a pot of tea at your table. They had tea. Disaster? Abort? No.

The short review: It rocked, great Chinese food ( pretty much the real deal, they just need more noodle choices ) great service. It was crowded and i was not the only asian..

so there.

*ok. The menus are in english, and the more exotic stuff is nowhere to be seen.. but i stand by the review! 5 Char siu baos is my rating.

An easy road to graying hair...

Greetings... as the title suggests, we will be talking about phone/call center based technical support and the escalation of support requests.

Apple and ATT, you fucking suck.  Do not pass go, do not collect your money. 

1: All groups responsible for a system or systems that impact customer experience must be  CUSTOMER FACING.  As a customer and a consumer i would like to have access to the groups or persons allegedly fixing my issue. Am i not allowed to speak to the mechanic? Can i not discuss with the chef? Sure we're not supposed to talk to the bus operator or the pilot, but the group that's doing moves adds and changes for the VVM systems? Unless its a matter of national security, forward the fucking call if i ask for esca -fucking -lation.

2: Update trouble tickets in a timely fashion. Don't leave resolution times open ended or say XX hours after which we will update you. Uh, no. TWTC and other Telco facilities will open  a ticket and take at least two contact numbers for status updates...which BTW are sent out on an hourly basis until resolution

3: Don't think the customer is too stupid to troubleshoot. It's a bad assumption, and i might be very pissy that day. Test/Troubleshoot/Test, replicate the issue and test again. Present findings to the support group or customer service reps in a timely fashion.

4: i can stay on hold for a very very long time...the hold music for most call centers i find...very soothing.

5: see number 4. i live in a rural remote area, lots of time ...tick tock, tick tock..

What is all of this leading to ? The line might have been crossed, the final straw placed on the ship of the sandy seas.. that is to say, my abode might be infiltrated with a RIM crackberry.. Oh irony, thou accursed and foul creature!

Post tenebras spero lucem 

Saturday, January 17, 2009


While the islands of Hawaii are one of the remote places on earth, it is a part of the USA. With the exception of certain rural areas and Ni'ihau, one could make the assumption that it is pretty easy to the things that we 21st century Americans have grown accustomed to, like say....saimin, or food in general? Making the assumption for Oahu, i think you would be spot on; a modern supermarket/shopping center/7-11 is just MINUTES from where you live. Unless you live at Turtle Bay, or Kaena Point. By minutes i mean pop to the store, pick up your twinkies and copy of 0-60 (or Automobile or Scientific American) pay the lady, go home. Total round trip, 15 minutes. If that.

Let us contrast and compare with rural Yamhill. Lets say you need a USB flash drive for your latest OpenBSD project or Hackintosh backup. Mcminville or Newberg? Fred Meyer or WalMart? East or West. Just to get there? Half an hour, maybe.

This means you are cruising down pastoral landscapes, while obeying any and all posted speed limits, cranking your favorite 70's era disco CD. The heater gently saute'ing your knuckles. Once you arrive and obtain your tiny piece of technology, you realize that you might as well get anything else you might need. Where is the Sambal? The KimChee? Paper Towels... we need this too... and food, that's going to run out. Ooo.... Steven Sagal DVDs..

You see how this is turning out? Even if you have a list, there is no such thing as a quick hop to the store. Unless you are going to the T&E General store.

So now, you head back to the vehicle and make the voyage back to Yamhill. While you and your knuckles are being slowly crock pot'ed by the heater, the strains of Meshuggah waft through the cabin. It doesn't make the trip any faster. Total elapsed time, round trip:

  • If you are on top of it, and get what you need and BAIL: 1 Hour
  • If you get side tracked, distracted or are prone to impulse shopping: 1.5 Hours to 2+ Hours
  • If you said screw this, we're going to Portland: 2, 3+ hours
  • If you decided to hell with it, i'm not going anywhere: 0 Hours

It's all about commitment..

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The road appears, the road is gone..

Let me just state for the record, that as an actual Ewa Beach-ite, it totally and truly sucks giant ass to drive in Yamhill County winter fog. Giant scary fog ass. Imagine fluffy pillow induced blindness. Now add highway speeds on country roads with a surprising lack of reflectors, road signs, and the ever present overhead sodium light. Ya feeling me? Wait, it gets better! Add tail-gaters, stir and enjoy!

We are talking so much fun, so of you might require a diaper. Or a pacifier.

Thankfully, the chores are done and i can indulge in paranormal tv night.


Sunday, January 11, 2009


Here is a pictorial synopsis of the Winter of 2008 in Yamhill:

Sunday, January 4, 2009


Skidding on ice
hidden by white snowy darkness
the tarmac waits to give rubber shoes
a way home.

Low Highbeams pollute the quiet of our county.
With this , the pony heads for the barn

One foot at a time

Friday, January 2, 2009

Figure of Speech.

When it rains, it pours. Funny thing is, this is the first time i've seen the big yellow ball of light in quite some time. Yes, i'm commenting on something else. What that something is...well, that's something else too.

Thursday, January 1, 2009


Happy New Year! First Post.



The strangest thing for the night of 31 Dec, 2008, was the quiet. Very, very quiet.

May this new year bring you peace,prosperity, and happiness.